Computer Analysis Exposes Rick Skindrud As The Blogger Behind The Curtain At "Playground Politics"
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE February 20, 2006 Contact: The LaFollette Institute of Public Affairs (D-Madison)
Computer Analysis Exposes Rick Skindrud As The Blogger Behind The Curtain At "Playground Politics"
A computer analysis sponsored by the legislative leadership of both parties has exposed Assembly Sergeant at Arms, and former Representative, Rick Skindrud as the cunning insider blogger responsible for Playground Politics -- http://playgroundpolitics.blogspot.com/. "Skinny exposed us and now we're exposing him," said Majority Leader Mike Huebsch (R-West Salem), "the brilliant sense of humor and subtle understanding of the capitol "sleeping at work" phenomena should have been a dead giveaway."
UW-Madison expert-in-all-things-to-do-with-government Don Kettl announced the computer's findings at a 1 pm press conference on the steps of the capitol. "Even though none of us have any real experience in government," said Kettl, "The LaFollette Institute has the brains and computer savvy to solve even the greatest challenge." Kettl then went on to mumble something incoherent about campaign finance reform.
When the scientists at UW-Madison analyzed word patterns in the Playground Politics site, the idea recognition system soon hit match after match with old Skindrud newsletters, floor speeches, and campaign literature. "Although Skindrud's staffers used to dumb down his ideas for public consumption," Kettl continued, "his wit and insight into the issues of the day just kept shining through." Skindrud was identified with 99% certainty by LaFollette statisticians.
The LaFollette study was commissioned during an Assembly Republican closed caucus a few months back, and funded after a secret meeting of all four caucus leaders. "Rick Skindrud has betrayed us for the last time," said Representative Carol Owens (R-Clueless), "we're taking away his computer, even though the Sergeant's staff is still claiming Rick never learned how to use it." Owens is heading a study commission to determine how best to prevent Skindrud and others from disseminating the ugly realities of Wisconsin politics to a larger audience. Steve Nass (R-Angry) will serve as the special committee's co-chair and propaganda minister.
"We can all breathe a sigh of relief that this menace has been exposed and silenced," concluded Representative David Ward (R-Weinie), "I really hate it when people who know us first-hand share our secrets with voters. What voters don't know, can't hurt us, and today's announcement is a victory for that principle."
